That fascination was a huge part of my escape, so Naomi Judd’s flashy outfits and the duo’s beauty and larger-than-life personalities were a clarion call to me. In the Eighties, I was obsessed with the rich and famous. The Judds were the ones who gave me permission to chase that dream. I was a closeted gay kid feeling really out of place in suburban Birmingham, so music became my world, then eventually my career, once I moved to Nashville at age 18 and became a music journalist and radio host. I learned to fly under the radar in my home to escape the chaos. But when he was in the grips of depression and addiction, I feared for his life, and sometimes mine and my parents’ lives, too. When David was sober and in a good head space, he and I shared a lot of laughs and a fervent love of country music. He died at 33, which means our family had three decades of just trying to get David to function. My brother’s life was so troubled, with mental illness and drug addiction intertwined so tightly that all of our family’s love, effort, prayer, and privileged access to mental health resources couldn’t pry it apart to get him the healing he sought. The muscle memory of that experience now serves me again as I come to terms with losing Naomi Judd, the country music superstar who became my friend and mentor. I learned that grief makes time elastic and causes physical strain on the body that requires rest. I showed up for my family and learned to grieve in real time and let the tears flow. Would I even survive the fall on the other side?īut I did survive. I felt like I was climbing up the steep hill of a rollercoaster I did not want to ride. I remember getting in the car soon after I got the phone call from my mother. It was a dread I hadn’t felt since I was driving home from Nashville to Alabama in 2017 when we lost my brother, David, to the disease of mental illness. The part of my brain that did comprehend Naomi Judd was really gone dreaded this big event - taking place a little more than a day since we lost her to “the disease of mental illness,” according to her daughters. I’m not ready to fully accept this reality just yet. It mercifully kept me from remembering we’d lost Naomi just two days ago for a few brief moments. The Judds are being inducted as the newest members of the Country Music Hall of Fame, and this is a moment I’ve been dreaming about with Naomi for years. Wynonna and Ashley Judd are sitting up front with Wy’s son Elijah on one side and Wy’s husband and current musical partner, Cactus Moser, on the other. RedTube is yours - your Home of videos Porno.I’m sitting in the CMA Theater at the Country Music Hall of Fame and Museum in Nashville.
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